The first question which calls for our consideration in this context concerns the functions
and duties which a woman can and must discharge, the particular types of psychosynthesis
which she can bring about in accordance with her particular psychological constitution, and
the many problems which arise from woman’s own psyche or n her relation with man.
Situations and problems of this nature arise in every woman’s life and it is necessary that
she face them in a way that is most satisfying to herself and to the other people concerned.
The most natural thing and frequent role for woman is that of being man’s companion, his
wife. An Italian author, Lucio d’Ambra, wrote two novels entitled respectively The
Occupation of the Husband and The Profession of the Wife. In these different designations
an important psychological truth is alluded to, namely that while man’s principal functions
are his activities outside the family and are of a social character, woman’s most important
activity, her “profession”, is generally in and with the family. To use a less modern but
gentle and apt expression: woman is, or should be, “the queen of the home”.
Unfortunately, this kingdom of the home is often troubled by silent or noisy disharmonies
and conflicts which sometimes shake it to its very foundations and can even dismember it.
If we search for the causes of these discords, we discover that there are mainly two:
selfishness and lack of understanding. The corresponding remedies can, therefore, be
reduced to two principal ones:
The first one is goodness and a spirit of sacrifice. These are hard to develop, but are high
qualities which everybody should cultivate because their fruits are most rewarding.
The second remedy consists of an intelligent, intuitive, willing psychological and spiritual
understanding. This understanding is not easy to acquire because the psychological
constitutions of man and woman are deeply different, much more so than we generally
realize. One could almost say that they belong to two different species. It therefore seems
useful to pause and examine somewhat the differing characteristics of male and female
psychology. In speaking frankly, I may at times seem rude to both sexes.
Typically, although by no means universally, there exists between a husband and his wife
polarities of psychological functions. The man tends to excel in certain vital operations while
the woman manifests others. For example, in dealing with the physical world, man has active,
manipulative and creative functions while woman, as wife and mother is primarily concerned
with maintaining and preserving the life and resources of the family. On the other hand, in
the sphere of the emotions and of the imagination, it is the woman who is usually the better
developed, more positive and productive of the two. In this area, the husband is apt to be
relatively naive and easily confused. So there is an apparent inversion of dominance
functions that man and woman need to appreciate, and therefore collaborate with each
other in order to form an effective team.
There is a similar inverted polarity between man and woman in the intellectual sphere. Man
tends to be the more rational, logical, and active. He is consciously oriented toward facts,
their relationships and their implications. By contrast woman’s mental functions are less
developed, but balanced by her superiority in another sphere, that of the intuition. This is
the capacity for attaining understanding in non-rational and unconscious ways which are fully
as valid as man’s thoughtful rationality.
These different polarities define some important qualitative distinctions between man and
woman. These differences can explain many psychological conflicts and disorders.
Speaking of man in general, the average so-called normal man develops qualities and
functions such as aggressiveness, mental activity, and efficiency. These he manifests to a
marked degree, whereas qualities of a feminine type such as sensitivity, feeling, imagination,
and intuition remain in an undeveloped and, at times, almost atrophied conditions. Because
these latter functions do not keep pace with the rest of his growth, it therefore often
happens that the average man remains relatively primitive and sometimes even barbaric. His
imagination, generally repressed in the unconscious, is disordered when it does rise to the
surface, and often expresses itself in fancies of which he himself is ashamed. His feeling
nature tends to remain primitive; he has neither delicacy nor plasticity. He can pass from
outbursts of almost savage passion to hardness and insensitivity, and vice versa, or he can
pass from insensibility to almost childish weakness and sentimentality. His intuition is
generally rudimentary, almost non-existent. He endeavors to solve all problems, whether
practical or abstract, through mental processes only, and because he does not take into
consideration the more subtle and imponderable elements, he is often mistaken. In the
various events of life, his cleverly formulated plans and programs often come to naught, and
instead of finding the faults that lie within himself and his own shortcomings, he blames
other people and events for his failures.
The psychological processes of the large majority of women are the very opposite. The
average woman’s opinion are usually nothing more than prejudices and superstitions to which
she clings obstinately, even in the face of factual evidence to the contrary. Of course, her
opinions are sometimes correct, especially when based on good intuition, but only too often
they are erroneous outcomes of personal emotions, of imaginings of various kinds, or of
blindly accepted traditions. It is typical of many women (particularly of those who do not
work in the professions or hold executive positions in public life) that they do not consider
the true nature of the problems with which they are faced. Their mental activity consists
of examining things in an unanalytical, diffuse, and inconclusive manner, with arguments that
are often of a personal rather than objective character.
It should therefore be apparent that the one-sided psychological development of the
average man or woman engenders deficiencies that result in serious problems. Most men and
women are in themselves incomplete, almost psychologically maimed beings. They can find
the solution of their problems only through mutual integration, i.e., by combining their
qualities so as to constitute together a complete human being.Man, insofar as his feminine functions are rudimentary, cannot understand and appreciate
woman. He feels himself attracted towards her, sometimes irresistibly; vaguely he is aware
that she possesses traits he needs, but he does not know how to approach her
psychologically. She appears to him as a strange, elusive, chameleon-like creature. The
acuity and changeability of her sensitivity, the wealth and plasticity of her imagination
disconcert and confound him; her intuition impresses him, but he cannot understand its
nature and origin; it perplexes him, and generally he is skeptical concerning it.
The average woman, in her turn, is unable to get out of her subjectivity and personal
approach to things, lacks understanding of masculine activities and qualities, and often does
not even try to understand them. She loves man, but with a personal, possessive, jealous
affection. But although she loves him, she neither understands nor appreciates his world,
his interests, his ideals. She is inclined to regard him as a savage who holds a delicate
butterfly with a rough hand, who ruthlessly destroys perfumed and many-coloured flowers,
as a naughty boy who is inclined to fight with others, as one who foolishly risks his life in
darling enterprises, who plays with his complicated machines, and who neglects those who
love him in order to chase after ancient ruins or rare manuscripts or to construct difficult
and useless theories and systems.
I have purposely exaggerated my description of extreme cases in order to drive home my
point with greater clarity. Fortunately, things are not as bad as all that, generally. Mutual
understanding is growing; modern life provides instructive experiences and encourages
adaptation. The painful shocks to which people are exposed often force them to think, and
this happens in social relations as well as with married couples. In this way, much has already
been accomplished, but more can be done. Decisive steps are needed in regard to our own
psychosynthesis, our internal unification. We shall then recognize that the qualities that we
observe in the opposite sex are external manifestations, projections, so to speak, of some
of the faculties which we also possess but which have remained latent, rudimentary and
below the threshold of our own consciousness.
In observing, understanding and appreciating women, man can develop his own latent and
rudimentary femininity, and a woman can do likewise as far as masculine qualities are
concerned. In this way, each can become, psychologically, a complete human being. Naturally,
each should always retain a preponderance of the psychological characteristics pertaining to
his or her own sex, but enough of the traits of the opposite sex can and should be
developed to produce the much-needed balance and integration. In building the
“psychological bridge” between the two sexes we shall arrive at a mutual understanding and
an adequate appreciation of each other. We can thereby eliminate painful misunderstandings
and artificial and unnecessary contrasts, and in their place produce a happy and fruitful
collaboration, the psychosynthesis of man and woman, the miracle of true love.
and duties which a woman can and must discharge, the particular types of psychosynthesis
which she can bring about in accordance with her particular psychological constitution, and
the many problems which arise from woman’s own psyche or n her relation with man.
Situations and problems of this nature arise in every woman’s life and it is necessary that
she face them in a way that is most satisfying to herself and to the other people concerned.
The most natural thing and frequent role for woman is that of being man’s companion, his
wife. An Italian author, Lucio d’Ambra, wrote two novels entitled respectively The
Occupation of the Husband and The Profession of the Wife. In these different designations
an important psychological truth is alluded to, namely that while man’s principal functions
are his activities outside the family and are of a social character, woman’s most important
activity, her “profession”, is generally in and with the family. To use a less modern but
gentle and apt expression: woman is, or should be, “the queen of the home”.
Unfortunately, this kingdom of the home is often troubled by silent or noisy disharmonies
and conflicts which sometimes shake it to its very foundations and can even dismember it.
If we search for the causes of these discords, we discover that there are mainly two:
selfishness and lack of understanding. The corresponding remedies can, therefore, be
reduced to two principal ones:
The first one is goodness and a spirit of sacrifice. These are hard to develop, but are high
qualities which everybody should cultivate because their fruits are most rewarding.
The second remedy consists of an intelligent, intuitive, willing psychological and spiritual
understanding. This understanding is not easy to acquire because the psychological
constitutions of man and woman are deeply different, much more so than we generally
realize. One could almost say that they belong to two different species. It therefore seems
useful to pause and examine somewhat the differing characteristics of male and female
psychology. In speaking frankly, I may at times seem rude to both sexes.
Typically, although by no means universally, there exists between a husband and his wife
polarities of psychological functions. The man tends to excel in certain vital operations while
the woman manifests others. For example, in dealing with the physical world, man has active,
manipulative and creative functions while woman, as wife and mother is primarily concerned
with maintaining and preserving the life and resources of the family. On the other hand, in
the sphere of the emotions and of the imagination, it is the woman who is usually the better
developed, more positive and productive of the two. In this area, the husband is apt to be
relatively naive and easily confused. So there is an apparent inversion of dominance
functions that man and woman need to appreciate, and therefore collaborate with each
other in order to form an effective team.
There is a similar inverted polarity between man and woman in the intellectual sphere. Man
tends to be the more rational, logical, and active. He is consciously oriented toward facts,
their relationships and their implications. By contrast woman’s mental functions are less
developed, but balanced by her superiority in another sphere, that of the intuition. This is
the capacity for attaining understanding in non-rational and unconscious ways which are fully
as valid as man’s thoughtful rationality.
These different polarities define some important qualitative distinctions between man and
woman. These differences can explain many psychological conflicts and disorders.
Speaking of man in general, the average so-called normal man develops qualities and
functions such as aggressiveness, mental activity, and efficiency. These he manifests to a
marked degree, whereas qualities of a feminine type such as sensitivity, feeling, imagination,
and intuition remain in an undeveloped and, at times, almost atrophied conditions. Because
these latter functions do not keep pace with the rest of his growth, it therefore often
happens that the average man remains relatively primitive and sometimes even barbaric. His
imagination, generally repressed in the unconscious, is disordered when it does rise to the
surface, and often expresses itself in fancies of which he himself is ashamed. His feeling
nature tends to remain primitive; he has neither delicacy nor plasticity. He can pass from
outbursts of almost savage passion to hardness and insensitivity, and vice versa, or he can
pass from insensibility to almost childish weakness and sentimentality. His intuition is
generally rudimentary, almost non-existent. He endeavors to solve all problems, whether
practical or abstract, through mental processes only, and because he does not take into
consideration the more subtle and imponderable elements, he is often mistaken. In the
various events of life, his cleverly formulated plans and programs often come to naught, and
instead of finding the faults that lie within himself and his own shortcomings, he blames
other people and events for his failures.
The psychological processes of the large majority of women are the very opposite. The
average woman’s opinion are usually nothing more than prejudices and superstitions to which
she clings obstinately, even in the face of factual evidence to the contrary. Of course, her
opinions are sometimes correct, especially when based on good intuition, but only too often
they are erroneous outcomes of personal emotions, of imaginings of various kinds, or of
blindly accepted traditions. It is typical of many women (particularly of those who do not
work in the professions or hold executive positions in public life) that they do not consider
the true nature of the problems with which they are faced. Their mental activity consists
of examining things in an unanalytical, diffuse, and inconclusive manner, with arguments that
are often of a personal rather than objective character.
It should therefore be apparent that the one-sided psychological development of the
average man or woman engenders deficiencies that result in serious problems. Most men and
women are in themselves incomplete, almost psychologically maimed beings. They can find
the solution of their problems only through mutual integration, i.e., by combining their
qualities so as to constitute together a complete human being.Man, insofar as his feminine functions are rudimentary, cannot understand and appreciate
woman. He feels himself attracted towards her, sometimes irresistibly; vaguely he is aware
that she possesses traits he needs, but he does not know how to approach her
psychologically. She appears to him as a strange, elusive, chameleon-like creature. The
acuity and changeability of her sensitivity, the wealth and plasticity of her imagination
disconcert and confound him; her intuition impresses him, but he cannot understand its
nature and origin; it perplexes him, and generally he is skeptical concerning it.
The average woman, in her turn, is unable to get out of her subjectivity and personal
approach to things, lacks understanding of masculine activities and qualities, and often does
not even try to understand them. She loves man, but with a personal, possessive, jealous
affection. But although she loves him, she neither understands nor appreciates his world,
his interests, his ideals. She is inclined to regard him as a savage who holds a delicate
butterfly with a rough hand, who ruthlessly destroys perfumed and many-coloured flowers,
as a naughty boy who is inclined to fight with others, as one who foolishly risks his life in
darling enterprises, who plays with his complicated machines, and who neglects those who
love him in order to chase after ancient ruins or rare manuscripts or to construct difficult
and useless theories and systems.
I have purposely exaggerated my description of extreme cases in order to drive home my
point with greater clarity. Fortunately, things are not as bad as all that, generally. Mutual
understanding is growing; modern life provides instructive experiences and encourages
adaptation. The painful shocks to which people are exposed often force them to think, and
this happens in social relations as well as with married couples. In this way, much has already
been accomplished, but more can be done. Decisive steps are needed in regard to our own
psychosynthesis, our internal unification. We shall then recognize that the qualities that we
observe in the opposite sex are external manifestations, projections, so to speak, of some
of the faculties which we also possess but which have remained latent, rudimentary and
below the threshold of our own consciousness.
In observing, understanding and appreciating women, man can develop his own latent and
rudimentary femininity, and a woman can do likewise as far as masculine qualities are
concerned. In this way, each can become, psychologically, a complete human being. Naturally,
each should always retain a preponderance of the psychological characteristics pertaining to
his or her own sex, but enough of the traits of the opposite sex can and should be
developed to produce the much-needed balance and integration. In building the
“psychological bridge” between the two sexes we shall arrive at a mutual understanding and
an adequate appreciation of each other. We can thereby eliminate painful misunderstandings
and artificial and unnecessary contrasts, and in their place produce a happy and fruitful
collaboration, the psychosynthesis of man and woman, the miracle of true love.
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